Philip McBride Johnson questions journalistic standards as Euro crisis spreads.
There is not much to chuckle about in the financial markets
these days. What with the exhausting European drama, stirrings
in the housing market, Wall Street shenanigans, and a national
political campaign long on commercials and short on ideas, we
need a break. We need a good laugh, and one prospect confronts
I refer, of course, to the business media headlines. Each
day, a reporter (or editor) feels compelled to link market
actions to external events. The connector word is usually "as,"
as in "Markets Retreat as Iran Tensions Rise" or "Markets Rally
as GE Reports Better-Than-Expected Earnings." Chances are,
there is a galactical chasm between the two events but the
practice persists. It is time for the rest of us to chime
This is why I propose a contest, open to all, to create the
greatest nonsequitur between financial results and extrinsic
happenings. For example: "Treasury Yields Approach Zero as
Johnson Retires." Or: "High Tech Stocks Fall as Coloradans
Mourn Massacre Victims." Or: "Housing Starts Revive as Beijing
Clamps Down On Internet Use."
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